Military Order of the
Cootie of the United States
Incubation Ritual or
Ritual of the First Degree
Instructions for Seam
Squirrels for Conducting the Business of Opening and Closing Scratches
1. The Ritual should be followed as closely as
possible. All Pup Tent Shavetails should familiarize themselves with their parts
so they do not have to read it, but commit the part to memory.
2. Each Shavetail should be so familiar with the
part of the initiation work to not have to read it, but simply use the Ritual as
a guide.
3. Rules of order for the V.F W. should be
reversed. To vote in the affirmative a Cootie should say “no”, to vote in
the negative a Cootie should say “yes”. Instead of making a motion, they
should rise and say, “I second the motion” A Cootie who intends to second
the motion should rise and say, “I make that motion.” To grant a member the
privilege of the floor, the Seam Squirrel should declare a member out of order,
and tell him to shoot. To make a member sit down and take the floor away from
him, the Seam Squirrel should declare him in order and tell him to sit down. For
a member to receive the privilege of the floor, he should rise and stand upright
with his left hand behind his back, his right forearm horizontal the height of
his chin, and give the Cootie Salute by scratching his chin, and say Cootie No.
So and So is speaking.
The Seam Squirrel should say, Cootie No. So and So,
is out of order, shoot.
4. On opening the Scratch after the giving of the
sign and password of the First Degree, all dues cards shall be verified by the
Hide Gimlet and Blanket Bum. Third Degree members only should be entitled to the
Third Degree password.
5. Pup Tent Shavetails shall hold a Shavetail
meeting once every three months and plan the Pup Tent activity for the next
three months, and give this information to all members of the Pup Tent. This
will build up the membership and keep the members active in the Pup Tent.
Special Instructions for
Pup Tent Quartermasters or Custodians of the Crummy Duffle Bag, C.C.D.B.
1. Receive all funds for the Pup Tent and enter the
correct amount in the Quartermaster’s ledger, giving a Due Card to members as
a receipt for dues paid. Insist upon seeing V F.W. Due Card paid to date before
accepting Cootie dues.
2. Pay all bills approved by the membership and
with the signature of the Hungry Nit and Seam Squirrel.
3. To make monthly report of Per Capita Tax on all
members who have paid dues for the full year.
4. Immediately after an Atom receives his First
Degree the Quartermaster shall forward the initiation fee of two dollars ($2.00)
for the Supreme Pup Tent to the Supreme Quartermaster for each new member taken
in. Pup Tents under the jurisdiction of the Grand Pup Tent will forward an
additional fifty (50) cents to the Grand Pup Tent as the Grand Pup Tent
initiation fee.
Upon receipt of initiation fee by the Supreme
Quartermaster, he will forward one Cootie hat with the State name only on it,
one pair of Tassels and one Lapel Insignia, to the Local Pup Tent Quartermaster
to be delivered to the new member, only when he has received his Cootie Degree
or the Third Degree The Pup Tent Quartermaster shall issue only a Due Card to
the new member on the night of his initiation fee, unless he is receiving all
three Degrees that night.
5. Any time when any questions pertaining to the
Quartermaster’s work or duties is not thoroughly clear, Local Pup Tent
Quartermasters are admonished to get the information by writing direct to the
Supreme Quartermaster.
Special Instructions for
Adjutants, Hungry Nit, Hungry Grayback, Hungry Cootie
The Adjutant of the Pup Tent shall keep his books
and files properly prepared. He should have at all times:
1. The By-Laws and Ritual, and all Rules and
Regulations of the M.O.C.
2. He shall keep the original application of every
member in a file.
3. He shall keep the Minutes of all meetings in a
proper manner noting that same have been approved, corrected or etc.
4 He shall keep on file all orders of the Pup Tent
Commander, Bulletins and Special
Notices as well as meetings notices. All lawful
orders and bulletins as issued by the Grand and Supreme Commanders shall be kept
in proper order for reference.
He shall keep a letter file for all communications
and orders.
6. He shall keep a roll of deceased members of the
Pup Tent with date of death and location of burial plot.
7 He shall keep a book wherein shall be listed the
names of those who have been rejected for membership, reason for same, and the
date.
8. a. He shall sign all vouchers for expenditures
presenting same to Commander and Trustees for signature before turning over to
Quartermaster for payment.
b. He shall notify all applicants in writing to
appear for initiations.
c. He shall prepare all reports and returns as may
be required by the Commander of Tent, Grand and Supreme Commanders and seeing
that a copy is forwarded to the proper persons.
These reports must be made out and properly signed
and forwarded with a check for per capita tax from the Quartermaster on the
first days of the quarters beginning January, April, July and October.
9. The Adjutant should, when any questions arise
pertaining to his office or duties, contact his superior officers as to routine
to follow.
10 The Adjutant shall keep all bits of news
information and see that they are forwarded to the Historians of the Grand and
Supreme Pup Tents, thus aiding the Pup Tent Historian to carry on his duties.
Opening of Scratch
Incubation
S.S.:
Nits will seek their seams and give their attention to the business of the
evening.
Nits will display the sign of incubation.
S.S., when ready: Blanket Bum, what are the first symptoms of an atom?
B.B., rising: An itching to become a Nit.
S.S.:
Hide Gimlet, what is a Nit?
H.G., rising: A Comrade who is closer than a Brother.
S.S.:
Provost Marshal, what steps must be taken by an Atom before he becomes a Nit?
P.M., rising: Backward steps.
S.S.:
Jimmy Legs, what is the first great duty of all true Nits?
J.L., rising: To increase and multiply.
S.S.:
Nits, let us all attend to that important duty and cause some Atom to take these
backward steps at our next Scratch.
Nits will prepare to prove
they are entitled to be present at this Scratch.
Nits will form in double rank, or fours if
necessary, in the center of the room, facing away from S.S.,
forming on B.B. and H.G., who will station themselves six feet in front of and
facing away from S.S. When all have been seated—B.B. and H.G. advance to the
front of the S.S. station and salute.
B.B.:
We find all Cooties present lousy and therefore entitled to remain.
S.S.:
That is lousy. Resume your stations.
S.S.:
Being satisfied that all present are crummy, and that we are all therefore on an
equal footing, I, the most crummy of all for the time being, do declare this
Scratch open for business, and each and every Nit who has anything to offer for
the good of the order or the members thereof shall be duly bound to present it
for consideration We will now proceed with the regular order of business.
S.S.:
Provost Marshal, you will retire with the Delousing Crew and advance the Colors.
Colors are placed.
Opening Prayer
O Thou Great and Eternal
God.
We are reminded there are
times of sorrow and of joy, times when we should be quiet and times when we
should be heard. We would pray Thy blessing upon our beloved military order. In
these days of great concern, help us to assert ourselves when we should and to
accomplish our purposes without offense to our fellowmen.
Give us the insight we
pray Thee to have all concern for sick comrades not only by material giving but
also showing concern by praying for them and their dependents. As we look to the
days ahead, may we by our faithfulness to the V.F.W. advance its cause and
programs and by so doing also advance our cause.
May we serve our beloved
order and our fellowman in such a way that we will receive eternal life as our
reward, so help me God. —Amen.
S.S.:
Cooties, attention! Salute the Colors.
S.S.:
Cooties, you will join me in the Pledge of Allegiance to the flag of the
Dismissed.
S.S.:
Hungry Nit, you will call the roll of Shavetails.
H.N. rises, P.M. rises, give Cootie salute; RN.
calls the roll; P.M. answers present for those absent and absent for those
present; when through, RN. Sits down.
P.M.:
Seam Squirrel, the roll has been called, absentees have been noted.
P.M. remains standing.
S.S.:
That is lousy, you will now direct to my station visitors of note.
Visitors are conducted to and seated to right of
S.S. station.
S.S.:
Provost Marshal, that is lousy, you will resume your station.
S.S.:
Hungry Nit, are there any applications for membership to this Crummy Fraternity?
Reading of Applications for Membership.
H.N.:
Seam Squirrel, there are … Atoms wailing at our outer seams, seeking admission
and a right to partake of our miseries and pleasures.
S.S.:
Hungry Nit, that is lousy; you will read the pleas of those who desire to join
our Crummy Fraternity.
Applications are read, and when through:
S.S.:
Cooties, you have heard the pleas, will those who are willing to vouch for these
Atoms now report?
Investigating Committee reports. When through:
S.S.:
That is lousy, Cooties, you will now express your desires in secret.
S.S.:
Provost Marshal, you will prepare the Crummy Duffle Cage ballot box and place it in the proper
location. Ballot
box is placed on S. S. station.
S.S.:
Cooties, you will now vote on the Atoms’ pleas for admission to the crummy
seams of this Pup Tent, remembering that the white elects and black rejects,
vote for the best interest of this Pup Tent.
Line up and do your duty.
When through voting:
S.S.:
Provost Marshal, you will convey the Crummy Cage to the B.B. for his inspection.
B.B. glances at the coins; if too many copper,
reports the Atoms are innocent, rejected. Voting is repeated. If silver is in
the majority, B.B. reports:
B.B.:
Seam Squirrel, I find the Atoms lousy. Provost Marshal, you will convey the
Crummy Cage to the S.S. for his approval.
S.S. glances at coins.
S.S.:
Cooties, I also find the Atoms lousy.
S.S.:
Provost Marshal, you will return the Crummy Cage to the Custodian of the Crummy
Duffle Bag for safe keeping.
S.S.:
Cooties, by your actions you have expressed a desire to have the following Atoms
… to join our ranks.
S.S.:
Custodian of the Crummy Duffle Bag, have the Atoms parted with enough duffle to
your satisfaction? All
fees paid.
C.C.D.B.: Seam Squirrel, that has fully been taken care of, they
are welcome.
S.S.:
Hungry Nit, you will place the names of these Atoms on our Honor Roll records
and notify them to present themselves at the proper time to receive the
applications of the Sulphur Ointment of Happiness.
Incubation
S.S., *: Inconsequential Nits, we are about to have the supreme
pleasure of conferring the Nit degree on such innocent Atoms as are now wailing
at the outer seams of this Pup Tent.
Note: The P M. is to remain in the room to preserve
order.
S.S.:
Shirt Reader, you will obtain from the Hungry Nit the names of Atoms who have
been duly qualified by the membership of this Pup Tent for admission to these
seams, retire to the outer seams, assemble and escort to the Sky Pilot’s
station the Atoms-in-waiting so that they may receive his wise counsel.
S.S.:
Prepare the Atoms to receive the Short-Form First Degree initiation.
Note: The Shirt Reader will blindfold the Atoms and
line them up facing away from the door. When
ready, knocks loudly.
J.L.:
Who knocks there?
S.R.:
Shirt Reader with innocent Atoms who have been accepted for membership in this
Crummy Fraternity.
J.L.:
Enter, Shirt Reader, and proceed to our wise counselor, the Sky Pilot.
Shirt Reader backward marches the Atoms to Sky
Pilot’s station and halts.
S.R.:
Oh, mighty Sky Pilot, I bring before you these innocent Atoms who are on their
first journey through the seams of this Pup Tent. They humbly plea for wisdom.
S.P.:
Most innocent Atoms, the time is rapidly approaching when you will be
transformed from an Atom to a Nit. I hope the transformation will be of benefit
to you by increasing your circle of friends and teaching you that a smile and
pleasant word is always worthwhile. We seek to teach you industry and
perseverence, to show you that there are others less fortunate than you, those
that lay in beds of white and those that have lost their loved ones and are now
in our National Home. We seek to remind you that HONOR and LOYALTY will remove
many obstacles from your path in your pursuit of happiness and peace. I urge you
to be guided by our namesake, the Cootie. He is never known to start something
he did not finish. He is a hound for punishment and never knows when he is
licked. He is never alone, but always surrounded by friends. Misfortune never
daunts him and while he may think the world owes him a living, he knows that the
surest way to get it is to go out and hustle for himself.
S P.:
Shirt Reader, you will guide the Atoms to the Hide Gimlet. They have proven
themselves lousy.
Shirt Reader backward marches them to the H.G.,
faces them away from the H.G. station, removes blindfolds, and when ready:
S.R.:
Hide Gimlet, before you stand innocent Atoms who have received instruction from
the Sky Pilot. They are here for further instructions.
H.G:
Innocent Atoms, you have been blessed with wise counsel from the Sky Pilot.
It’s now my duty to inform you that we are not going to have a lot of fun with
you. We do not intend to heap all sorts of indignities upon you to make you look
as ridiculous as we possibly can before all those assembled here.
H.G.:
Shirt Reader, you will guide these innocent Atoms to the Seam Squirrel for
advice as to what is expected of the inhabitants of the seams of this Pup Tent.
Atoms are backward marched to the S.S. station.
S.R.:
Seam Squirrel, these innocent Atoms have backed into this Scratch according to
custom. They have been counselled by the Sky Pilot, They also have been advised
by the H.G. They are ready to receive the pledge of secrecy.
S.S.: Shirt Reader, that is lousy. You may resume your station.
S.S.:
Innocent Atoms, before proceeding further along the seams of this Pup Tent it
will be necessary to take an obligation of secrecy which, I admonish you, is not
to be taken frivolously. If you feel you cannot take such an obligation that
will bind your tongue in silence forever, let it be known now. Hearing no
objections, you will raise your right hand and repeat after me. Pronounce your
name when I pronounce mine.
I, …, in the presence of
the officers—and members of this Pup Tent do sincerely promise—upon my honor
as a man—and a Veteran of Foreign Wars—that I will forever keep secret—any
and all the events—that transpire in any Pup Tent—of the Military Order of
the Cootie—that I will not make known—to anyone outside the confines of a
Pup Tent of this Order—any secret work oral or written. I, furthermore,
promise—that I will not pollute the seams —of this Pup Tent—by inviting
for membership —any Atom whom I know is unworthy.
All this I promise to
uphold as a man—and should my affiliations with this Order cease at any
time—I will keep inviolate this obligation—as though I had remained a member
thereof—I hope to be despised—as a loathsome, crawling reptile —among my
fellow beings. Down
hands.
S.S.:
Provost Marshal, you will now instruct these Atoms in the full work unwritten
and the signs and password of this degree.
Note: The Atoms are given all the signs and
password of this degree, also the following:
1. Rules of order for the
V F.W. will be reversed. To vote in the affirmative a Cootie will say “no”,
to vote in the negative a Cootie will say “yes”. Instead of making a motion,
you will rise and say, “I second the motion.” A Cootie who intends to second
the motion will rise and say, “I make that motion” To grant a member the
privilege of the floor, the Seam Squirrel will declare a member out of order,
and tell him to shoot. To make a member sit down and take the floor away from
him, the Seam Squirrel will declare him in order and tell him to sit down. For a
member to receive the privilege of the floor, he will rise and stand upright
with his left hand behind his back, his right forearm horizontal the height of
his chin, and give the Cootie Salute by scratching his chin, and say Cootie No.
So and So is speaking. The Seam Squirrel will say, Cootie No. So and So is out
of order, shoot.
2 . On opening the Scratch
after the giving of the sign and password of the First Degree, all dues cards
will be verified by the Hide Gimlet and Blanket Bum Third Degree members only
shall be entitled to the Third Degree password.
3. Pup Tent officers shall
hold a Shavetail meeting once every three months and plan the Pup Tent activity
for the next three months, and give this information to all members of the Pup
Tent This will build up the membership and keep the members active in the Pup
Tent, and when
ready:
P.M.:
Seam Squirrel, the Atoms are now ready to be called Nits.
S.S.:
Provost Marshal, that is lousy. You may resume your station.
S.S.: Inconsequential
Nits, you have this day been transformed from an Atom to a Nit, which is the
first step in your journey to that sublime position enjoyed by a Cootie.
There are two more degrees
that you must take before becoming a full-fledged Cootie, with it the age of
peace and happiness. As soon as you have made suitable progress in conducting
yourselves as a Nit, you will be entitled to make application to the next higher
section of this Order, the degree of Grayback. You must remember that your
membership in this Order depends upon your active membership in our parent
organization.
Reinstatement in the
V.F.W. does not necessarily mean your reinstatement in the MOC. You must present
a paid-up receipt card in the V.F.W. with a card in the Nit degree before you
can gain admission to a Scratch of this Order. With my best wishes that you may
become a real member of this great fun loving Order, that you will be an asset
rather than a liability.
I now declare a recess of
five minutes so that you may be properly welcomed to the seams of this Pup Tent.
After recess: proceed with regular order of
business.
Closing the Scratch
If no response, S.S.: Cooties, attention! Salute the Colors.
Dismissed.
Colors are retired.
Closing Prayer
S.S :
Before we go into the Degree Work, all members should understand that this
Ritual is a combination of the former Long and Short Form Rituals. The Degrees
given by the pup tents are at the discretion of the pup tent.